Nurture Notes- March 2019
Margaritas on the patio…..satisfying!!
Personal photo
Welcome to Nurture Notes*, a discussion about how to use the principles of Intuitive Eating to nurture your whole self.
Last week I had a terrible cold that left me with a stuffy nose and I couldn’t smell anything for days. Not being able to smell affected my ability to taste. Nothing that I ate had any flavor. Although I was eating regularly, eating tasteless food left me feeling unsatisfied. Eating without experiencing the aroma and flavor felt mechanical rather than pleasurable. I ate until no longer hungry, but I was not fully satisfied with my meals. Once my smell and taste senses came back, I became aware of how grateful I am to experience different food flavors, textures, temperatures, and aromas. The experience made me think about people who live with sensory disturbances, and I can’t imagine what it would be like not to see, taste, smell, and/or touch food. I started thinking about how important satisfaction is during eating. I’d like to spend some time talking about satisfaction in eating as a key element of becoming an intuitive eater.
How satisfied are you with the types of food you eat on a regular basis? If you are not satisfied with the flavors, textures, aromas, and temperatures of the foods you are eating, have you paused to consider why that might be? Are you experiencing changes to your senses that impact your relationship with food? Have you fallen into a pattern of eating certain foods on autopilot? Are you following a protocol or plan (in other words a diet) where someone else is dictating what and how much you are eating? Do certain foods scare you? Are you on a tight budget? Hate to cook or prepare meals? Is your home environment chaotic? Are you overwhelmed, stressed, busy, etc.?
There are many reasons within, and outside of, our control that affect our satisfaction with food. Food is an essential fuel source that ensures our survival and is pleasurable. For those of us who have consistent access to food, satisfaction with eating is equally important to nourishing our bodies regularly with fuel. Part of becoming an intuitive eater is regularly honoring your hunger and choosing foods that are satisfying to you. Human beings have a unique ability to eat a wide variety of foods (barring any medical issues that affect your senses, digestion, immune system, etc.) compared to other mammals. I’m not sure we would have survived very long as a species if food wasn’t tasty and satisfying! Since we need to eat on a regular basis every day of our lives, seeking out foods that satisfy us makes a (sometimes) mundane daily task more interesting and pleasurable.
Embracing pleasure in food can be difficult if you attach moral judgments to the foods you are eating (e.g., good, bad, sinful, clean, etc.). How comfortable do you feel when you think about experiencing pleasure in eating? If you notice discomfort around the idea that food is pleasurable, take a moment to consider what makes you feel uncomfortable about pleasure. Is pleasure equated with negative behaviors or traits like being out of control, selfish, gluttonous, or greedy? Do you fear the attention or judgment of others if you experience pleasure? Unpacking your feelings and beliefs about pleasure is an important first step. Seek out the assistance of a therapist, or an Intuitive Eating counselor like me, if you need help processing your feelings about pleasure.
Fear of eating pleasurable foods can turn us into restrictive eaters. Are your food choices driven by what’s available to you, what appeals to your palate, and what would satisfy your hunger? If not, are you choosing foods based on the food's calorie count or weight-reducing “power”? We can easily be seduced into believing that the lowest calorie option is the best or “healthiest” option. Consider the following story: I had a client who told me about a time when she was dining out and really wanted to order nachos. Because she had labeled nachos as “bad” and an “unhealthy” choice, she ordered a salad with grilled chicken and dressing on the side. The meal was completely unsatisfying to her. She was still hungry when she got home and found herself devouring ice cream and potato chips in order to find some satisfaction. In the end she felt physically stuffed and guilty. I think her story is a good illustration of what can happen when we disconnect ourselves from our true desires. Eating something that doesn’t satisfy you leaves you wanting more. Overeating later is a common way that many people compensate for their dissatisfaction. Every meal or snack you eat may not be exactly what you want or are craving, because that is not realistic or feasible for most of us. However; if you are regularly choosing to eat foods that are satisfying to you, the urge to overeat in the quest for satisfaction will lessen. I encouraged my client to experiment with ordering something she truly wanted to eat the next time she ate out. Although she was apprehensive about the experiment, she ordered a pasta dish, ate with attention to the flavor, and felt satisfied when she left. When she got home she enjoyed the rest of her evening and wasn’t on the prowl for snacks. Anyone who has been on a diet has tried to eat around cravings by making “healthy” alternatives. For example, sometimes people eat air popped popcorn with no butter as an alternative to potato chips (which is what would satisfy them). What happens most of the time is that the individual eats the popcorn, is unsatisfied, and then eats the chips. Guilt and shame usually follow, along with restriction to compensate for the alleged dietary transgression. Not a fun cycle to be in. Eating with satisfaction means that if potato chips sound good to you, you eat the chips attentively, and you stop eating chips when you are satisfied. Yes, this scenario is possible!!!
When you are ready to discover or rediscover your satisfaction with eating here are some suggestions for how to get started:
1) Make a list a of foods you really love to eat. What qualities do you enjoy about the foods you listed? Start to look for trends in terms of textures, flavors, temperatures, aromas, etc. If you experience feelings of discomfort while working on your list, pause, acknowledge the feeling, and write a little bit about your discomfort. Come back to the activity when the negative feelings pass.
2) What do I feeling like eating? If you are stuck and can’t decide what sounds good to you, start to go through a mental checklist of food qualities:
Textures- do you feel like something smooth, soft, creamy, gooey, sticky, crunchy, hard, grainy, chewy, juicy, raw, or cooked, etc. or a combination of textures?
Appearance- what attracts your eye- a variety of colors, different sized food items, how the foods are plated, etc.? We are less inclined to want to eat something that looks bland, dry, colorless, etc.
Flavors- are you in the mood for a savory, herby, salty, acidic, bitter, sour, spicy, bland, sweet, citrusy, earthy, woody, smoky, grilled, or buttery etc. flavor or a combination of flavors?
Temperatures- does a cold, cool, or room temperature food sound better than a warm, hot, or steaming food? What is the temperature of your environment- is it cold, a warm spring day, a hot/humid afternoon, a cool, breezy fall day, etc.? A mug of hot apple cider may not appeal to your palate on a humid summer afternoon!
Amount- how much volume do you need? Are you hungry for a full meal, a light meal, or a snack? Do you want heavier, filling foods or lighter, airy foods?
Aroma- does a fruity, pungent, smoky, meaty, garlicy, herby, or buttery, etc. aroma appeal to your sense of smell? Appealing aromas are necessary for a satisfying eating experience. If the aroma is unappealing to you, take that into consideration when you make a selection.
Once you are able to identify the food qualities that are appealing to you, try to match your desire with what you have on hand or have access to. For example, if something savory, chewy, yeasty, hot, and gooey sounds good and you are meal hungry then maybe pizza will satisfy you.
3) What do I do if nothing sounds goods or I don’t want to eat? Your body still needs fuel to function optimally. If your body needs fuel but nothing sounds good, build balanced meal with a variety of macronutrients (fat, carbs/starch, protein). For example, a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, cut up raw veggies, a piece of fruit, and a cookie. Many grocery stores and popular coffee chains serve prepared meals and bento-style boxes with a variety of foods that you can grab and go. If you are in recovery from an eating disorder: your hunger cues may not be “online” and eating every 3-4 hours is essential. The kindest thing that you can do to further your recovery is to eat even if you are not hungry or nothing appeals to your palate.
Take some time this month to choose foods that satisfy your palate. Feel the difference that satisfaction can make in your life. If you are able to, set aside time to eat so that you can focus your attention on your food. You can even start with just one or two mindful bites a day and see if you notice a difference………
Savor and enjoy,
Nicole
*Disclaimer: The information contained in this post is for educational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical or mental health care.