Steps Toward a Better Body Image Tip #2- Gratitude is an Antidote for Discontent

Jon Kabat-Zinn, renowned meditation teacher, defines mindfulness as: “…the regular, disciplined practice of moment-to-moment awareness…, the complete “owning” of each moment of your experience, good, bad, or ugly…” Mindfulness meditation has it’s origin in Buddhism, although it’s practiced today by individuals of all belief systems. When I was taking classes to learn about mindfulness meditation, I learned that suffering, discomfort, and discontent arises from ruminating about the past or worrying about the future. Mindfulness meditation teaches us to be aware of the present moment, experiencing and accepting what’s happening in the moment. Since we can’t change the past or predict the future, noticing what’s happening in the present can help us learn to cope with our emotions and body sensations, by being with them, rather than trying to change them. Negative emotions, bodily discomforts, and other forms of suffering are an inevitable part of life. When we practice being mindful, we can change the way we experience these inevitabilities.

In both my personal and professional experience healing body image issues, I’ve discovered that body image distress is brought on by a fixation about what our bodies used to look like (e.g., thinner, fitter, younger) or used to be able to do (e.g., run faster, fit into smaller clothing sizes). Similarly, preoccupation with making our future selves vastly different than our current selves (e.g., “If I could only lose weight, then I’d be happy, successful, etc.”) also leads to feelings of discontent.

Consider the following scenario: Sherry is getting dressed for the day and put on a pair of jeans that she hasn’t worn for a few months. She notices that the jeans feel snug and she has difficulty buttoning them. Sherry feels uncomfortable and think to herself, “I’m getting so fat that my pants don’t fit anymore. These jeans used to be loose. All of my clothes look bad on me. If I continue to gain weight I’ll never be able to meet anyone. I’m so gross. I really need to lose weight.”

In the scenario, Sherry had an experience of body image distress. She felt uncomfortable in a pair of jeans that she felt fit snugly and that she had trouble buttoning. The discomfort and distress that arose for Sherry happened in the present moment. However; in response to the negative feelings Sherry began to ruminate about the past (her size, how the pants used to fit), prognosticate about the future (continual weight gain, inability to meet someone), and got stuck in cognitive distortions (e.g., thinking that none of her clothes fit just because her jeans felt tight, judging herself as gross, and thinking that she needs to lose weight). That’s many more layers of suffering added on top of her body image distress.

All of us will inevitably experience body image distress at one time or another (or often!). Sitting with our discomfort about our bodies can be challenging. We can practice noticing the feelings of bodily and emotional discomfort and labeling them as such. We can own our discontent with our bodies. Once we’re able to own our feelings, we can start to take the next step toward a better body image.

One way to take the next step is to practice using gratitude as an antidote for discontent. More often than not, our negative thoughts and feelings about our bodies are directed at our outward appearance. We wish for thinner thighs, more muscle tone, a smaller nose, etc. etc. When you have a negative thought or feeling about your body’s appearance, notice the thought and respond back with a statement of gratitude for what your body does do for you all day every day.

Example thought: “I wish my thighs were smaller. They’re so flabby.”

Gratitude response: “I’m grateful for my leg muscles because they helped me walk around today.”

If you get stuck consider being grateful for your heart (allows your blood to circulate), your arms (because they help you hug your children), and so on.

Gratitude is an excellent antidote for discontent. Try it out and see the difference it makes in your journey towards a better body image!!

XO Nicole

Photo by Freshh Connection (@freshhconnection) via Unsplash